I realized that God does not exist- Testimonies of Ex-Christians
ExChristian.Net -- encouraging ex-Christians

encouraging de-converting and former Christians
Personal de-conversion testimonials submitted to ExChristian.Net. The ExChristian.Net blog exists for the express purpose of encouraging those who have decided to leave religion behind. It is not an open challenge for Christians to avenge what they perceive as an offense against their religious beliefs. Over 1,100 testimonials are archived in this area. Testimonials are archived by month/year.

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Sent in by Kyle

Hi. My name is Kyle, I live in Austin, and I am a former devout Christian.

I grew up in a semi devout family. By semi, I mean that my grandparents on both sides were extremely religious, but my parents were not too religious. I did the whole CCE Church deal on Wednesdays as a child, and went to Church on Christmas, but that was about all.

However, once I became about 15, I started to study more about religion. This was my Confirmation year for the Catholic Church, so I started wondering a bit more about why I was Christian. And, I ended up becoming extremely devout. Every week I would now go to Church with my grandparents on my mom's side, and I became extremely religious. My grandpa on my dad's side is a Protestant Pastor for the Church of Christ, and so I talked with him all the time, about theology, the Bible, and anything Christian!

So, to sum it up... My parents were not really religious, but when I became a teen I became extremely religious. My grandparents were religious, and they always took me to Church functions, and all that.

So, I stayed extremely religious all through high school, and then my Freshman and Sophomore years of college. I had read the bible many times, did the Rosary daily, you name it!

Now if you know about Austin, you will know it is a very liberal city. Liberals all over! So during my years, I met many open homosexuals, and all that. In college, I met a very good friend of mine who told me he was gay.

Now this friend of mine (who I will call J) is the nicest guy I have ever met. He is such a great, loving person. And, he is gay. And I just asked myself "Why would God send this dude to hell for being gay!" It just made no sense to think about such a nice person going to hell.

So, I started questioning the ideal of hell. And then, many more questions popped up. I started readings some atheist books. I began to look at the skeptical approach to not just Christianity, but God in general.

So, questions filled my head. And I was worried about all these questions. I could not sleep at night. So, I just kept thinking about it for about 3 or 4 months.

Then, I decided that theism was not right. I just found that the Bible is a book that is nothing beyond human comprehension, and was just not satisfied. I learned about a lot of pagan roots in the 3 abrahamic religions, and learned a lot of skeptical approaches to different aspects of religion. I studied other religions during this time.. Islam, Hinduism, Buddhism, Shinto, Ositris, you name it..

And, I just could not believe in a God anymore. I just realized that God does not exist.

For a few months it depressed me. But, then I became more appreciative of life.. this world is so amazing, and I am just so glad to be here.. It is great to see how this world works, without thinking of some "loving God".

I just graduated from college, and I am now a happy atheist. :)

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