ExChristian.Net -- encouraging ex-Christians

encouraging de-converting and former Christians
The ExChristian.Net blog exists for the express purpose of encouraging those who have decided to leave religion behind. It is not an open challenge for Christians to avenge what they perceive as an offense against their religious beliefs.
by Mriana

I want to share something with all of you, because I finally made what feels like a small step towards freedom, especially when I hung up the phone after talking to my mother.

The night before she informed me that my younger son would be better off if he became a Christian and blabbed on and on about it as though it would cure his problems. I asked her, “What if he chose Buddhism?” She responded, “NO! There is no Christ. Blah, blah, blah.”

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by Mriana

 Bible Alive "Faith in the Synoptic Gospe...Repentant Mary Magdalene, First half of the 16th century. Giampetrino (Giovanni Pietro Rizzoli)

All my life it seems I have thought differently than most people, but then again, I am weird in other ways too. I am physically different too. No, not like dwarfism different. I maybe short, but I am not a dwarf. I am talking mirror image to other people, such as left-dominant and, oddly enough, my heart, like some other organs of my body, tilts the opposite direction of most people's. That is the difference I am referring too, but most people would not know this, until I told them.

My thoughts about religion appear no different and with all this talk of late concerning "God's Love," I am left scratching my head, because I do not see love in the stories of which Christians love so dearly.

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by Mriana

(In loving memory of a WWII atheist in a foxhole; one of my heroes)
"I want you to be all love. This is the perfection I believe and teach. And this perfection is consistent with a thousand nervous disorders, which that high-strained perfection is not. Indeed, my judgment is, that (in this case particularly) to overdo is to undo and that to set perfection too high (so high as no man that we ever heard or read of attained) is the most effectual (because unsuspected) way of driving it out of the world." —Works, vol. vi. p.715. ~ John Wesley ( http://homepage.mac.com/craigadams1/WESPERF/SECTN02.html )[sic]


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by Mriana

death cultImage by pyota via Flickr

I have not said very much about this because I find it a very painful and upsetting subject, even though it comes out in bits and pieces sometimes. However, I do not think my story would be complete if I did not touch upon the subject of taking religion so far that it causes death. Not just death, but even attempted suicide in some cases. For me, my grandfather was the first in a series of such things and I was twenty-three years old with a newborn son at the time.

About twenty years ago, my grandfather killed himself.

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By Mriana

BEst-FriendImage by Untitled blue via Flickr


"And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over."

That is basically the response I got from a long time friend that I thought I could trust or who I thought was a friend that I could trust, but, and I hope I am wrong, apparently there were conditions to that friendship. Before it was over she was telling me what I could not say, what I should write, and eventually, when I asked her two honest questions, she gave me what was, in my opinion, a trained response. It really was like I had threaten her beliefs and I could not believe she was a person who would feel insecure about her beliefs when someone expresses a different view, but I guess I was wrong.

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By Mriana

I need to rant, because I am currently sick of religion and apologize for not responding to many blogs lately due to being sick of religion. Sadly, living where I am, I see and hear it all around me almost every day, but it is worse when it is in my face.

Let us start first with Separation of Church and State, which appears to be nonexistent where I live. I tried for years to shelter my sons from Evangelicalism, even here in Pentecostal Land, but that ended for my younger son when he first went into treatment four years ago.

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By Mriana

LiverpoolImage via Wikipedia

One of the things I have noticed over my lifetime is the death and destruction of the Religious Reich, everything from suicide to murder. They might not pull the trigger personally, but they do seem to find some poor bloke they manage to brainwash and mentally abuse to do it for them. All too often the Religious Reich wants to control the masses via religious dogma that makes absolutely no sense in light of scientific knowledge, especially and including Women’s Reproductive health. Sadly, when they cannot have control of the masses, they attempt to take it by force, in some manner, and then attempt to base it on their so-called “good book”, when that book can be shredded and put back together again after showing them just how much they do not know about it. I intend to do just that too, because as a Christian friend of mine has told others since the murder of Dr. Tiller, I will not back down or even stand down, at least not in writing, especially in the face of a heinous crime done in the name of religion. Trust me; it had religious dogma written all over it.

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By Mriana

What I am about to say is offensive to many of our Christian (and Muslim) visitors, but humans are apes and as such, we are animals. Some of us even behave worse than other animals, especially with how we treat each other, the environment, and even ourselves. Other animals sometimes treat the human child far better than humans treat their own species. Even at a very early age, before I comprehended Darwin, we would go to the zoo, and I would see in the chimps and gorillas, “people” much like us, except with fur. Therefore, there was never a doubt in my mind that we have a kinship with other species, including our pets.

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By Mriana

The crew of the original Enterprise, except Hi...Image via Wikipedia



As I mentioned before, I was born in 1966, a few months before the season premier of Trek the Original Series. I grew up with the saying, “We strive to better ourselves and humanity” among other sayings that are very much similar to what is found in the Humanist Manifestos and all prior to age seven.

The age of accountability among Christians is seven, but for seven years, I saw reruns of TOS and I remember sitting in a Lazy-Boy chair when I was four watching a “laughing Vulcan” who was sprayed with some powder from a flower, as well as Tribbles, and Apollo (see “Who Mourns for Adonis”). At the same time, we rarely went to church around this time, but there were rare occasions that we did. I have an idea of how old I was because we lived in Alton, IL prior to me going to first grade. We did not live in the country until after I entered first grade, so I have some demarcation of age.

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By Mriana

Jean-Luc Picard as LocutusImage via Wikipedia

I am reading Marlene Winell’s book, “Leaving the Fold”, and I got to a point in the book that really hit very close to home. I doubted that it would for various reasons, but it did. My first reaction was to explode on her in an email, but my anger was not directed at her. Rather it was directed at two people who are now dead: my minister great uncle and grandfather.

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By Mriana

When I was little, I had a great uncle who was in WW II, and is not to be confused with the great uncle that was a Free Methodist minister. He was a medic, who decided which fallen soldiers they could medically saved and who could not. It was not an easy job; I am sure, and probably traumatic enough to cause PTSD. Of course, back then, they called it Shell Shock. However, I do not believe for a minute that lovely man was suffering from anything, not even anger with God, as my grandparents had insisted. This dear man returned home, but he could not continue in the medical field. As to the why, I never was privy to the information or if I had been, I do not remember. The reason did have something to do with the military though.

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By Mriana

View towards the Saint Francois Mountains of t...Image via Wikipedia



Some generalizations were made concerning “Christian Girls in the Bible Belt” in a forum thread. I would like to address that from my own experience, which may or may not be typical or apply to all Bible Belt Fundie Girls. No, I will not be rude and crude like that “Su-tha-na fella” who was quoted.

Truth is, I think some young women from the Bible Belt are trying to find something they never received, yet greatly needed, as a child and probably do not have a clue what it was either. I question whether one can ever retrieve it even. In addition, since those in the psychology field, at least according to my relatives, steal souls, they rarely get counseling much less even consider it.

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By Mriana

Borg Queen in First ContactImage via Wikipedia

A few days ago, I went to work and when I got there, I started spouting off about Christians. Then the other day Valerie made a post and off I went again on another rant (she can take it, I’m sure), once again and in part due to her encouragement, I am yet again writing (people want me to write, yet I’m a starving artist). This time it is a rant and the outcome of both incidents. Ah, well… maybe it will do someone some good. Maybe me, if I can get out of my cynical mood.

In response to my rant at work, a younger co-worker said, “Oh tell me about it!”

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By Mriana

Today's ImageImage by charluna via Flickr

I have mentioned a few reasons, including disbelief, as to why I left the Church and can never go back even just to attend for the social aspects, like Bob Price does. Here is yet another reason as to why I know I can never go back. The Episcopal Church, as well as other churches, has major fasts and feasts, as well as minor feasts and fasts. Except for Easter, because I have always loved chocolate and the new life Spring brings, I never did celebrate feast days. At one time, when I went to church regularly, I could name all the fast days and seasons. Lent is another one in which fasting is involved, but the majority of healthier people do not literally go on a forty day food fast and for me, religion was a part of my own eating disorder.

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By Mriana

Vegetarian Bodybuilders

One of my older son’s friend’s mother said vegetarians are weak to me almost a year ago and tried to tell me that not eating meat is a sin. She even quoted chapter and verse, from the Bible, that justified her inane belief (Romans 14:2), as well as other verses that state all foods “are made clean” and alike. I was irate! As soon as my son came home and walked through the door I said, “Keep that woman away from me!” He said, “What did you do now?” I replied, “I didn't do anything!” Then I explained to my fellow vegetarian son what happened between us. He asked to see the verse and saw the following verse after it, which she did not read, “Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats; for God has received him.”

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By Mriana


munchie, originally uploaded by
Dee*Lightful Photos.

Sometimes when I hear various religious concepts, which are just human concepts, I internally feel like my younger son who has Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD-NOS) - a form of high functioning Autism, Not Otherwise Specified. I have watched my son over the years and sometimes I have thought, “I feel like he acts” as he does his frustrated and confused behaviours concerning the external world around him. For years now, I get this dark void in my mind concerning various religious concepts and cannot help but think “It makes no sense. That makes no sense. You don’t make sense.” Sometimes I feel like I could almost rock back and forth as I think in my mind such statements. Abraxas, of the formally titled “Coffee, Cigarettes, and Gnosis” podcast (http://www.thegodabovegod.com) in his interview with Tom Harpur, played a sound clip towards the start of the show that said, “Some people lose their faith because heaven shows them too little, but how many lose their faith because heaven shows them too much?” With my years of research on the subject, I too could ask the very same question, because in a sense I was “shown too much”.

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By Mriana

My alarm went off and I woke up to a local United Methodist Church advertisement, which stated, “If you have values, then people trust you.” Then some mumble jumble about Methodist doctrine concerning values and the man ended with, “Come visit Schweitzer United Methodist Church...” This was not the dance music I like to awake to of a morning with one or all three of my cats wanting my loving attention, nor was it the sound of birds celebrating the spring morning, much less my values, but rather an assault to my morning senses and thought processes. Not to mention, my cats had no clue as to why I suddenly jump to smack the radio with annoyance.

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Hell Awaits You!Image by danny.hammontree via Flickr

By Mriana

The title for this article is a quote from Holly Near’s song “I Ain’t Afraid” (http://hollynear.com/lyrics/i.aint.afraid.html), and I write this rant in the same fashion as her song, because I am not afraid of anyone’s god, but rather what they do in the name of their so-called deity. This behavior keeps me in the closet with my disbelief here in the Bible Belt, because I have been through such vicious and disgusting behaviors before, which I have no desire to experience again. I only hope that one day such behaviors will end and it will not matter if one is a humanist, non-theist, atheist, agnostic, or whatever label they chose for themselves.

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Still frame from the animated cartoon "Th...Image via Wikipedia

By Mriana

When I was little, there was this cartoon series involving Casper the Friendly Ghost, and I had an invisible friend, as do many children, only his name was Casper. Romper Room hosted some of the Casper shows, which caught my attention and probably encouraged my desire to learn, but it also gave me my invisible friend.

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The Human Condition, 1935Image via Wikipedia

By Mriana

I was born in May 1966, a few months before the Star Trek Original Series came on TV. From the very first episode, my mother watched it, with me on her lap nursing, without knowing or at least not comprehending the Roddenberry’s underlying message, which even Majel confirmed that Gene did use the media to convey a message to the public. I attribute this message as being part of what kept me holding on to some sanity, even though I did not figure out what the philosophy was until I stumbled onto it in my teens. This gift, which I now hold dear, was taken from me, by my mother, even before I had a chance to claim it as my own, but it was not lost forever, even though it became a long journey to make my way back to it again. I guess you could say I grew into their philosophy and they indirectly helped raised me. Maybe I did not better humanity in some manner, but I was struggling to better myself and it was indeed a struggle.

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By Mriana

Image via Soulfountain


(Names have been changed/withheld to protect the living)

In 1973 I was seven and riding back home with my parents after spending a long summer with my grandparents. I don’t remember much before then, except bits and pieces, but after that was living hell, which I have no knowledge as to why. The thing is, as a child, none of it was my fault, but rather the adults in my life and it had nothing to do with a god. It was all on the humans.

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